John Baldessari, True to Form (from Goya Series), 1997
Part of why I’m drawn to objects is because we can count on them. They’re reliable. We don’t have to wonder what mood they’ll be in or how they’ll receive us. We get to receive them. This is why they can help us to ground so well - because they aren’t projecting anything onto us. Whatever you’re getting from an object has to do with you, and if it’s not “you,” it’s your conditioning, societal programming, etc. We can let go of the attachment of the object being a symbol of identity or status, and instead, simply true to form. We can focus on the lines, the texture, the material and see it for what it is - an inanimate object. Letting go of attachment does not translate to detaching from warmth. It’s about detaching from the needing. We are whole as we are, and we don’t need any person, place, thing, or object to complete us. So when we let an object be true to form, without a story of how it should fill us, we leave room for us to be true to form as well. That’s why this series is focused on attachment. I’s about letting go - of how we think things should be, should look, should feel.
We often assign meaning to the experiences we go through. This is a very human thing to do and can sometimes help us to make connections in our lives in order to grow. However, if we attach to the meaning, we can miss the reality in front of us. So we can find meaning in our experiences while simultaneously honoring them in the most stripped, literal way. Because when we let go (of our agendas, motives, dreams), we see things as they are. For instance, you can feel an intense connection with another person and then realize that the relationship has no place to go. Perhaps the other person does not honor the connection, or perhaps they simply are not showing up in an honest way. You don’t have to denounce the connection. You can still honor it. You can hold space for it. So long as you realize that you don’t need it. So if it doesn’t pan out the way you hoped, or if the other person doesn’t show up in a healthy way, you can let go of the person, the story. But the connection remains - it will always exist.
By letting go of the stories and expectations of our objects, we are actually strengthening our connection to them. We are seeing them in their purity, and in this space we can see ourselves more clearly. We can honor ourselves as we are. In a physical sense, we can honor the shape of our bodies, the curves and crevices and marks (just as we do with our objects), and then we can honor ourselves in the metaphysical sense - in our wholeness. When we go to the metaphysical without first grounding in reality, we can get ourselves in spaces of delusion and fantasy, where things become skewed. The point of going into the metaphysical is to be in our truth, where sometimes things just are without logical explanation or evidence. When we enter this place while grounded in the present, we can access our inner knowing without the noise of confusion.
So when we work with our objects, we can rely on their concrete nature. This structure is what actually helps us to live with more ease and fluidity. We can be here, now. Free of our stories and past experiences. Free of what others may think of us. We forget about all of that. We can be present.
If you’re looking for personalized guidance and/or to dive deeper into the work, feel free to contact me or to book a private session.
