Posts in ethical objects
Mused: Holiday Self Care Guide
Mused Holiday Self Care Guide

Last year I created a conscious holiday gift guide to suggest ethical items by independently owned brands for you to gift to your loved ones.  I felt called to take a break from providing you with more gift ideas this year.  We are so pressured during the holiday season to shop and consume, so I wanted to instead present a self-care tool guide for you to unwind and ground with.  You can find most of these items already in your home.  I’ve included a simple ritual you can perform with each object.  The rituals are meant to be simple and fuss-free, for anyone to enjoy.  While this is not meant to be a gift guide, if you do feel inclined to gift any of these items to friends and family members, consider hand-writing a note of the ritual listed (or create your own) to encourage self-care and nourishment this time of year to those around you or far away. Escape the whirlwind of holiday parties, unhealthy food, and uncomfortable family dynamics, and treat yourself to these acts of tension relief while listening to the dreamy playlist here.

One of my favorite simple practices is putting fresh, warm sheets on my bed.  The act of doing so always makes me feel connected to the place where I recharge my body. While I do this once a week for all of the linens on my bed, I change my pillowcases every few days to keep where I’m resting my head clean.  These pillowcases from Deiji Studios come in so many beautiful colors.  They’re made from 100% stonewashed French linen and will soften with wash/use.  They’re also hypo-allergenic and environmentally friendly.

Whether you’re grabbing pillowcases warm from the dryer or folded in your linen closet, familiarize yourself with the fabric.  Run your hands over the material, lift it up to your nose to get a sense of the smell.  As you slip them onto your pillows, set an intention for your evening of rest (regardless of the time of day).  Your intention can be as simple as getting a night of deep, restorative rest, or asking for your dreams to reveal some truth to you. 

Scent is a powerful yet often overlooked sense.  It is known to trigger memories and emotions and can take us to nostalgic and/or new places.  I love this incense from Haeckles - the only ingredient is lemon balm, which is used to reduce stress and increase calmness.  I also steep lemon balm into my daily infusions for a full body effect.  Read about Haeckles and their incredible story here, yet feel free to use any incense of your liking.

Take the time to light your incense and use it as a signal to pause for the day.  As the scent of your choice starts to fill the room, sit down and meditate.  Whether you do this for 3 minutes or 30 minutes, be grateful for the stillness. Pay attention to your breath, and as the thoughts come in, detach from them and release them.  Keep coming back to your breath, as it will connect you to your body.   

I light candles every night prior to going to bed.  It’s a simple ritual I’ve come to rely on, and it creates a bit of romance as an act of care to end each day. I’ve been lighting beeswax candles because they not only burn clean, but they also purify the air. Big Dipper Wax Works collects 75% of their beeswax from the Pacific Northwest and British Columbia because the crops there rank lowest in exposure to pesticides in North America.  They’re currently working on creating fair trade partnerships with beekeepers in foreign countries, where they source the rest of their beeswax.  Their product is extensively tested to insure high quality.

Prior to lighting your candles, plant your feet on the floor and breathe that grounding energy to every part of your body.  As you light them, ask for truth to be illuminated to you in anyway it needs to come through.

Simple acts we perform every day can become rituals that feed us, even in the smallest ways.  This comb by Une Heures is so beautiful that it inspired me to add hair combing into this post, yet the ritual below can be done with any comb/bush you already have.

Pay attention to the way the comb feels against your scalp and the way it catches strands of hair to smooth your locks as you brush.  Start out in front of the mirror so you can observe the process, but then close your eyes in order to feel into your body. Remember to pause each time you use an object as a tool to help serve you.

Taking a bath is perhaps the most referred to and obvious act of self care.  For those of us who have a tub and access to clean, running water - it’s truly an accessible luxury.   I was fortunate to try these bath salts by Vessel Surface Care, and I used them up in about a week (I took a lot of baths in that week).  These salts are enriched with bentonite clay, ginger, dandelion leaf, and essential oils of cypress and rosemary for aiding in the detoxification process.  This bath soak is perfect for this time of year, as we aim to unwind from all of the excess around us (sweet treats, alcohol, and perhaps even unwanted energies from family gatherings and holiday parties).  Each product by Vessel is formulated by Seattle-based health coach, Lizzy Ott.

Rather than checking your phone while waiting for the tub to fill, open your bath salts (or soap, etc.) and smell them.  Close your eyes and allow the aroma to fill your nostrils, and continue to breathe this scent into your chest.  Exhale and repeat until you feel calm and centered.  When the bath is ready, use your hands to administer the salts into the water, as opposed to pouring them directly from the bottle.  Get your body aquatinted with the product prior to soaking in it.  These acts enable a simple way to ground into your body prior to the even deeper grounding you’ll be doing when submerged in water.

I wanted to include bowls in this round-up because one of my favorite things to eat during this time of year is soup.  I’ve been making a delicious squash soup with garlic, onions, ginger, and thyme.  My body craves it.  Soup or not, eating out of a bowl is my favorite way to eat.  I have buckwheat cereal nearly every morning, and for dinner I usually make a warming mixture of veggies, grains, and herbs.   There are a ton of ceramic bowls in my kitchen cupboard (hand thrown by my housemate), and I love how irregular they are.  Each one has its own personality and feeling.  I often write about running hands/fingers over the texture of our objects, and ceramics are one of my favorite items to do this with.  The bowls featured above are by local Santa Fe artist, Kimmy Rohrs of Whiskey & Clay.  I adore all of her work.

As mentioned already, run your fingers on the surface of your bowl to take in the texture.  Notice how it feels against your fingertips and how that translates into the rest of your body.  Is it rough, soft, smooth?  Try to hold or touch the bowl with one hand as you use your other to fill it with your meal.  We can always slow down with our objects in the simplest ways.

I practice journaling nearly every day. Nearly, because I’m human and sometimes life happens, but I do commit to it as a daily practice. It helps me to center in a way that nothing else (not even meditation) does. I’ve been practicing this for over five years, and it changed the trajectory of my life when I started. These are the only journals I write in.

Check-in with your inner self. How’s your heart? When you answer, start writing with your non-dominant hand. This will feel weird at first, but it will help the truth to come through. If you don’t know where to start or if answers are not coming through easily, just scribble, draw, etc. (with your non dominant hand). It may trigger words to come, or it may be all you need to get your weirds out. Some other prompts that may be fitting for this time of year: “what do I need to feel safe?” “what would be true if I slowed down?” “how can I show up for myself in the most authentic way?” “how can I nurture my simplest needs?”

In Process: A Poem
in process_Paige Geffen_Object and Us

It is with my cup of tea that I take an inward breath before exhaling

It is while pouring the hot water that I experience the welcomed warmth of steam enveloping my face

It is how putting pen to paper transforms stagnation into fluidity.  

Our objects help us to be in process

They allow us to work with our hands

To find beauty in the mundane and meditation in the minutia.  

Our objects enable us to touch, to feel, to be in our bodies

The sensual experience of sliding a ring against the soft skin of a finger, 

of intertwining legs in warm linen sheets, 

of touching lips to the smooth ceramic surface of a mug

This is in process.


In process there are no shoulds or should nots

only inhales and exhales

even through the hardships

the heartbreaks

the messiness

the misunderstandings

In process there is breath

and therefore, breadth.

In process we experience

the small moments that teach us 

the presence of being alive 

and being alive does not always feel the way we want it to 

as it can be heart wrenching, unkind, gruesome, and painful

but in the presence of whatever arises, we come back to the essence of truth -

Objects are inanimate without us

home is inherently within us 

bring them inward 

to guide yourself home 

as even here, you are

in process.

Objects & Attachment: Crumbling Expectations
Paige Geffen_Objects & Attachment

Some of you may know that my parents recently had all of our family home videos digitized because I posted a few of them on my stories.  A lot of them are fucking hilarious, and I simply couldn’t resist sharing them.  I sat through and watched nearly all of them (there are many) in one weekend, and I observed that I was almost always making weird noises and faces.  I was also almost always told to “stop doing that,” to “look at the camera,” and to “show my face.”  

So I learned to stop doing that.  Not just from the commentary of my parents, but from the confines of society.  Do you ever feel completely repressed because it’s socially unacceptable to make a weird noise/face/body movement in public?  I do. We are told to explore and to be creative, but within the confines of a box.  “Be yourself!”  “No, not like that.”  I’m sure you’ve heard this before.  Yes, social etiquette is in place for a reason, but these rigid lines also keep us small, safe, and sheltered.  They make us feel like we cannot veer outside of the box, but at the root, that we cannot fully be ourselves.  

Let’s try to blur those lines a bit.   We can start by working with our objects in new ways.  I’ve written about how most objects have a self-evident, assigned purpose, yet it is us who assign meaning through use.  So we can flip this “self-evident” model on its head by foregoing labeled use and instead tapping into the wisdom of our bodies.  We can allow ourselves to veer of course by assigning nontraditional purposes to some of our objects, in order to practice a deeper sense of connection with our natural instincts.  Perhaps your mug will become your new vase, your kitchen bowl will instead hold extra toilet paper rolls in the bathroom.  Tap into your inner wisdom while observing your objects - how will each object best serve you?  If you want to put your salt holder on top of a stack of books to also hold your rings - do that. If you want to use a chair as your bedside table - go ahead. Challenge your own perceptions.  This will ignite dormant creativity for you to tap into, while helping you to break free from the confines you place on yourself, as well as on your possessions.  

Here’s an exercise you can practice if you want to go deeper:

Where do you hold yourself back?  Where do you limit your fluidity in order to keep yourself safe?  Use these questions as journal prompts.  Then see where you can challenge what comes up beyond your mental perceptions, but rather by how you operate in your space.  

If you’re looking for personalized guidance, you can book a session by clicking the button below.

Mused: Sensual Healing
Mused_Sensual Healing_Object and Us

In last week’s post, I wrote a nightly shut-off ritual, where I suggested having a bit of a sensual experience with your sheets prior to going to bed. This exercise is truly about connecting to your body in order to ground before falling asleep. Sensuality is about awakening pleasure in the senses, and no, it’s not always related to sexuality. The reason I practice grounding with objects is because they are physical, and grounding is about physical connection to our bodies and to the earth. Yes, our objects can be machine made out of less than “earthly” materials, but you can actively choose to surround yourself with objects made mindfully. I encourage you to observe your objects, but I also encourage you to touch them. Run your fingers over the imperfect texture of your ceramic vase, your hands on the soft paper of your book. Awaken the pleasure in your senses, and feel into your body. We can choose to check-out and we can choose to connect - it’s up to us. Here are some recommendations of beautiful items to connect to your sensuality (all female-owned brands), and listen to the Sensual Healing playlist while you browse.

Lonely is “for women who wear lingerie as a love letter to themselves.” - Helene Morris, Lonely Designer. They are an ethically based company in New Zealand with stockists all over the world and celebrate fostering positive body image for all women. On their website, you will find their Lonely Girls series, where they feature women wearing their beautiful pieces in the comfort of their own spaces. I am completely in love with this beautiful set photographed by Kelly Geddes (one of my favorite photographers) for Anyonegirl, which is the perfect segue to the next item.

Anyonegirl is an online and in-print journal, with beautiful photography and insight. I first discovered them while shopping at Passenger (a lovely store in Echo Park) and picked up the first issue of Waist. “WAIST considers the ideas surrounding the female mid-section, both inside and out, exploring sex, movement, digestion and a woman’s GUT INSTINCT.” I am excited to explore issue 03.

I just discovered Nedda Atassi, a ceramicist whose work is absolutely stunning. I’m captivated by her use of organic shapes. The crinkled vase, featured above, is the perfect object to practice grounding with. It’s made of the earth, free-form, and there’s so much to explore in the texture. Browse more in her shop.

The work of Studio Mari is both interesting and timeless. I recently had the pleasure of meeting Mari, and she is no different. Her jewelry pieces are like small sculptures, alluding to much larger references. Putting on jewelry can be a slow experience. Explore the piece as you slide it down your finger or clasp it around your neck. All pieces by Studio Mari are designed and made in Los Angeles. Shop here.

Willow feminine oil is about “embracing women’s sexuality through self care.” Willow is comprised of high quality oils to help balance hormones and PH levels, soothe irritation, and nourish the skin. Oh and I haven’t mentioned - it’s for your vagina. I need to get myself a bottle, but I did try the oil (on my hands) when Nicole, the founder and creator, let me try it prior to the launch. It smells incredible, and it can be used on other parts of the body as well. Vaginal health is so important, and we often neglect this area as a result of lack of information and understanding of the best way to care down there. Our everyday soaps can be very stripping to this area. Willow can help you to break this neglect with a simple, nourishing, and hopefully sensual ritual. You can purchase the oil here.

Eliana Rodriguez recently debuted her line of beautiful and simple comfort-wear, Gil Rodriguez - a clothing company designed and made in Los Angeles that adheres to ethical and sustainable practices. They source their fabrics from local mills and fairly compensate their workers. These are the Benton Leggings, made of 90% cotton, and they look incredibly comfortable and soft - to touch and against skin.

I recently came across Dehei, a New Zealand-based range of knit bedding made of 100% cotton marle. Dehei means “at home” in Swiss. Make these products part of your nightly ritual, and you’ll certainly feel at home within your bed and yourself.

Listen to the playlist here while practicing some of your new rituals.